2025 Achievements & 2026 Goals

Achievement this year

• Started this year with a part-time job

• Submitted thesis draft

• Delivered viva

• Submitted correction

• Graduation and convocation

• Ending the year with a full-time contract

• Met dreamies in real life

Lessons learnt

• I have so many hutang with people — hate that

• Jangan selesa with my own pace

• Do better with the current ibadah

• Have better self-organization and daily routines

• Please… work lama sikit. Jangan asyik balik rumah je

• Please take note of kata-kata orang for your own good

New year goals

• Stay at this place for a year

• Be better at work, focus to step up skills

• Buang habit last minute and suka lambat-lambat

• Achieve the target for ibadah, kewangan, and health

• Cari jodoh… maybe can start mid-year nanti? Hihi
  
  

Hope to be a better and mature version of myself 💖

New chapter - Finally ♥️

clearing drafts - 9/9/25 1.25 am

Alhamdulillah ala kulli hal.

After years I was in this slump, akhirnya aku berjaya keluar juga. Bak kata pepatah, it takes a village to raise a child kan, but for my thesis, I think it takes a whole nation to complete this journey.

Kan orang cakap, PG is a lonely ride. Yes, it was lonely. But to be honest, my ride only bergerak due to the high support and dorongan from everyone. It was never really me who menggerakkan .... it was them:

• my supervisor: giving me topics, direction, and redirection

• my co-supervisor: motivating me to search for deeper knowledge

• my uni (and SV grant): providing me financial freedom

• our MNM and degree chingu: deep talks, consultations, and heavy discussions on research topics

• the students during TA experience: giving me the opportunity to fulfill my dreams

• PG community: giving time to socialise, expand networks, and learn new things

• experts (high school friends, classmates, seniors): extensive validation of my lengthy work with nothing in return

• and of course, my father and mother: endless financial and mental support, and the main support in achieving the respondents’ target

• to the respondents, thank you for taking your precious time to complete the survey

I was just there, assembling the information that had been given by everyone. Slowly… aju aju slowly.

To be honest, Master was never in the plan. And the only objective was… to prove to myself that I CAN DO BETTER. Since I did not give my best during my degree years, I was hoping to demonstrate how far I could fly while doing Master. But it was totally… the opposite.

Never… never in my life have I done such a cincai task like that. My thesis draft was produced by the worst version of me, and seriously, it was the worst version of my work. It felt quite unfair, honestly, submitting the draft while I was given the opportunity to chase the angan-angan of my dream.

Thank you, Allah. Alhamdulillah. Allah helps a lot. And I redeemed myself a bit during the correction round. All I hope now is to complete this journey without another hiccup… and ... 

I think I discovered now… I have a dream.

Please pray for me.

Attached to the past.

I think its time for me to let go things in the past. Its not about dark, tragic or trauma thingy, its mainly about the happiness, sweet memories and beautiful life experiences.

The problem is that, I am so grateful to these memories, yet the only way to convert those feelings was through saying "thank you" (which is not even enough to the "bare minimum"). Therefore, I have been attached to the leftover feelings for years.

Those are VERY beautiful moments for me, but what if, its not the case for others? And .... conveying my feelings right now for the deeds that occurred years ago, might be burdensome to certain people.

So, I have decided to let everything go and move on! Past is past, and let's change for the future 💖.

Peace ✌

Hello Future

Assalammualaikum korang, hiks. Hahaha.

Saja nak update, sekarang saya tengah minat NCT DREAM.

Dengarlah repackage album diorang ... Hello Future. Tu je, okbye.

Semoga kawan-kawan saya semuanya sihat wal'afiat sahaja di mana korang berada. Amin.

Thank you.

Is it worth to start over?

Assalammualaikum guys.

How are you?

Okeyh gais. Aku terdengar lagu korea ni kat tiktok, macam best gitu. So, aku google, rupanya OST Itaewon Class. Aku ada tengok drama ni tapi tak habis sebab time tu banyak drama baru keluar, jadi aku tolak tepi cerita ni. Hehe. At first, aku eksaited sangat tengok cerita ni bila watak utama berjaya merealisasikan goal dia which is untuk bukak bar dalam masa sekian-sekian tahun. Macam termotivasi kejap nak ada wawasan. Namun, itu semua hanya sementara. Hahaha.

Okey, now straight to the point. Aku cuma nak cakap bila aku tengok lirik lagu ni, aku terus emosi. Banyak kali jugaklah tengok video english subtitle sebab kejap nak nyanyi, kejap nak nangis, kejap nak mengimbau kehidupan. Haih, macam-macam.

I am not sure the accurate translation for this song (its Start Over by Gaho btw), but I am assuming this song is about starting over (buka buku baru) your life to achieve your dream. Whatever your dream is, you should go for it, struggle for it and insyaAllah, you will achieve it at the end of the day.

It start with this sentence : 'New beginnings are always exciting' 

Yes, it was. That is what I thought when I want to pursue master last year. But, now here I am. Stuck out of nowhere. Not sure this struggle worth to give my all or should I drop it, before its too late. If you want to start afresh, this song may motivate you to go forward. But, if you are in the middle of your journey, currently contemplating on your decision ... this song may bring you down, though. Or maybe just for me.

By the way, there's this line in the chorus 'I can fly the sky.. '. Haahh ... terus teringat Climax by Team B, '. You know, they struggle back then (not sure for real or just an act, but still the struggle is so real for me). And now, the leader of team b is not there anymore after he and his team went to the second war and successfully debuted (still, i was grateful that they were not disbanded after the first program). But, aku tak boleh tengok la second program tu, it kinda kejam sangat untuk tengok diorang fight with each other T-T. Fight with other team is okay but fight within a team is a no-no for me.

Well, not that I am saying that the struggle for Hanbin was all useless as he is not in the group anymore. Wherever he is now, that experience was important, it shaped him to whom he is today. Same with me here. I always grateful and embrace all my life experiences as I strongly believe that experiences and environments shape a person the most.

What I am trying to point is to reflect and to choose the best decision for your own good. Choose your life goals. Ask yourself what is the most important aspect in your life. Is it attitude ? status ? financial ? time ? family ? health? Plan your path with that. And if you want to start a new journey, know when to hold on till your last breath and when is the right time to give up. That is the key.

But, remember, life is a journey, not a destination.

ps : I refer the translation here :https://lyricskpop.net/lyrics/gaho-start-english-translation/
Regards,
Me.

Azam Tahun Baru : Tawar

Assalamualaikum reader =)

Alhamdulillah, kita masih diberi peluang untuk hidup di atas muka bumi ini. Untuk tahun ini, aku berazam untuk menjadi tawar. InsyaAllah, akan aku cuba sedaya upaya aku untuk buang segala sifat-sifat jahat dalam diri ini, agar tidak pahit seperti dahulu.

I've been really happy tengok friends yang dah dapat kerja, graduasi, sambung belajar, melancong, mengerjakan umrah dan semua nikmat serta kebaikan yang mereka dapat. I'm okay with that.

Tapi bila datang conversation ja, aku tak boleh tahan dari jadi bitter. Maybe due to the fact that aku selalu nak buat lawak hambar yang padahal takda orang gelak pun. Atau the fact yang aku selalu nak menang. 🙊Therefore, I need your support to doakan saya. Syukran jazilan in advance.

Aku berharap agar bisa aku lakukan kebaikan biarpun dalam keterpaksaan atau kepalsuan agar tidak lagi aku menyesal di kemudian hari.


Side story : Rapuhnya Si Aqidah

Aku tak nak buat entri baru jadi aku citer sini. Hehe. Kelmarin aku scroll Twitter, ternampak satu tweet ni yang dia suruh retweet untuk avoid bad luck, atau nanti jadi macam dia (si commenter) . Dalam tweet tu dia letak gambar dia with dahi lebam (bad incident macam tu) sebab tak retweet tweet bad luck tadi. Hati aku pun berdegup kencang ah nak retweet. Astaghfirullah. Dasyat kan? Aku dah la risau pasal aktiviti esok tu (harini), kemudian jumpa benda macam ni ... aku boleh pulak senang senang percaya.

Tak tipu aku katakan, sejak aku tinggal sekolah, rapuh sangat aqidah ini. Lagi-lagi bila kita sudah tidak berguru secara depan-depan. Bila masuk uni, aku macam give up sikit nak mendalami pasal agama disebabkan banyaknya kekhilafan yang wujud antara aku dan kawan-kawan serta guru-guru. Pegi kuliah ni kata begini, kuliah esok kata lain pulak. Ni baru dalam negara, kalau aku gi belajar luar negara ... lagilah celaru. Haha. Aku bukan tak nak belajar ilmu agama, tapi aku sangatlah perlukan buku teks (silibus) dan guru yang boleh mengajar aku bertahun-tahun. Demand pulak kan? Hahahaha.

Jadi, banyaknya kat universiti tu, aku dapat mengembangkan ilmu agama aku dalam pelbagai bahagian dan alhamdulillah ada juga yang dapat ku dalami seperti sirah-sirah Rasul dan sahabat. Tapi tu la, rancak rantingku tumbuh, tanpa sedar akarnya kian rapuh. Mungkin ada yang sakit dan ada juga yang telah lama mati. Tapi, alhamdulillah, Allah beri sahabat-sahabat yang hebat-hebat dan nikmat online pada hari ini. Setiap kali hati ini bertanya 'Benarkah Allah itu wujud?', berbaliklah kita pada jalan kebenaran.

Ok, mari kita solat Isyak ... satgi. XD

Hupdate !

Assalamualaikum kawan

Apa khabar Ramadhanmu di sana ?

Moga baik hendaknya

Saya di sini masih terawang-awang, sebab tu mengarut hupdate post memalam ni. Wakaka

Okey bai

Love you, always.